Musings from the CU Suite

Written by Anthony Demangone

On Sunday, Kate and Briggs turned four.  I can't adequately describe how much they mean to me.  How much they have improved my life. And how much I love them.  

My inability to describe those things, though, is coupled by this fact: Many of you know exactly what I mean. How I feel.

 

Invariably, there are always a few of my friends who are expecting their first child.  And invariably, they reach out and ask for advice.  If I had four lessons from my first four years, it would be these.

1. There's no magic formula.  As a parent, it is tempting to believe in magic formulas.  There must be some secret to get a child to sleep through the night, right?  The more I read, and the more I learn, the more I doubt in such things.  What works for one person's kid, might not work for yours.  There may be a long line of people telling you what to do.  My best advice is to realize that there's no magic formula.  Do your research. Do your due diligence.  And do your best.  You will mess up.  Pick yourself up, and your kid if necessary, and get back at it. 
2. You're never done.  Early on, we'd have Briggs and Kate out with us when they did little more than sleep.  Parents of toddlers would say things like...Oh, wait until they can walk!  Then the real work begins.  When Kate and Briggs could walk, parents would say things like...Oh, wait until they can talk.  They it really gets tough.  And now parents and say things like...Oh, wait until they get into high school.  Then it really gets tough!  Each stage of parenthood is wonderful and terrifying in its own way. You never climb the mountain of parenthood.  You never cross the finish line.  Looking back on the "good ole" days or waiting for things to become easier...good luck with that.  You're a parent.  You will be for the rest of your life.  
3. You have less control than you think. The other day, Briggs used the word "murder."  Hmmm. That's not a word I enjoyed hearing from my little buddy.  Where did he learn it?  School? Television? The playground?  But does it really matter?  I can't protect Kate and Briggs from the world, even if I wanted to.  But here's what I can do:  I can control my environment.  I can set an example.  I can set expectations.  I can teach.  And I can discipline. Understand what you can control, and focus on that.
4. You have a job to do.  Keep that in mind.  Your job is to arm your kid with the knowledge, self-confidence, social skills and other intangibles necessary for them to succeed - when you're not around. 

Now, this is a management blog.  So do those rules apply to managers?  I'll leave that to you.  For now, I just want to thank my two favorite four-year-olds for teaching this old dog a few new tricks.

Oh, and for becoming self-sufficient in the area of potty training. 

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Guys, if you are serious about compliance, you need to seriously look into purchasing the GPS for your credit unions.  Yes, I am biased - it is a NAFCU product.  But for those of you who know me, you know how much I value compliance officers and risk management.  Dollar for dollar, I can't think of a better investment to help manage compliance risk.